Sunday, April 26, 2009

One of my favorites...



Warren Barfield: "Love is Not A Fight"

Love is not a place
To come and go as we please
It's a house we answer in
Then commit to never leave

So lock the door behind you
Throw away the key
We'll work it out together
Let it bring us to our knees

Chorus:
Love is a shelter in a raging storm
Love is peace in the middle of a war
And if we try to leave, may God send angels to guard the door
No, love is not a fight but it's something worth fighting for

To some, love is a word
That they can fall into
But when they're falling out
Keeping that word is hard to do

Chorus:
Love is a shelter in a raging storm
Love is peace in the middle of a war
And if we try to leave, may God send angels to guard the door
No, love is not a fight but it's something worth fighting for

Love will come to save us
If we'll only call
He will ask nothing from us
But demand we give our all

Chorus:
Love is a shelter in a raging storm
Love is peace in the middle of a war
And if we try to leave, may God send angels to guard the door
No, love is not a fight but it's something worth fighting for

I will fight for you
Would you fight for me?
It's worth fighting for

Friday, April 24, 2009

It's a Wonderful Life

I officially graduate in 4 weeks!!!! 

Although there is nothing to report on the job front, I am more positive than ever. I truly believe everything will work out in time, and the way God wants it to. I'm not worried about it any more. I am still applying for jobs, but I with a totally different attitude. Now instead of feeling rejected if I don't hear back from a place, I just realize that it wasn't meant to be, and I'm okay with that. 

I actually think it would be great to have my summer off. I have been working my butt off since I was 15 years-old. I think I deserve a few months of freedom. Technically, I really only need a job by November because that is when I am going to have to start making payments on my loans. 

So, life is good! I am BUSY BUSY BUSY, and always tired...but I am still able to find things to laugh about so I consider myself lucky. For example, yesterday, after only getting one hour of sleep, I made myself a smoothie before taking a nap...and I attempted to put the base of my blender in the freezer. Seriously?! Who does that? LOL. 

Being able to laugh not only at myself, but at anything has seriously changed my life. I use to be a very serious, straight laced person, and while I still consider myself those things I have definitely loosened up. This is going to sound stupid, but ever since I started watching an episode of F*R*I*E*N*D*S in the morning I have been a totally different person. Starting out my days with a laugh, or a smile has helped me become more positive...and life is so much better when you are positive :)

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Dino's for Dinner

Today has been another busy, tired day. I didn't get home until after midnight from my clinicals at Children's Hospital, I made it to bed by 1:30 AM, and had to be up at 7:30 AM for class. Which means I have been seriously dragging.

The bright part of my day was dinner! (If you can call it that because I ate at about 3:30 PM). I went to Dino's. Oh so good!


I think their spicy gyro sandwich is exactly what I needed before a long night of homework and studying! Have I mentioned that I am an emotional eater? Yeah, that's me to a T. I have been craving chocolate every night and though I have not caved into making cookies, I might have to. The good thing is I have not drank pop! You might not remember, but my New Years resolution was to not drink pop for 6 months. At first I thought about it every day, then only when I ate out...and now only when I am stressed, but I have not caved in! Yay me!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

I'm still alive!

I swear I have not died. I just have been incredibly busy...however, tonight was wonderfully unproductive. Well...not really. I applied for several jobs, and did some grocery shopping; but other than than, I didn't do any homework!!!

Tomorrow I need to hit the library. Do my sister's make-up for PROM!, go to church, and watch "Marley and Me."

Finally...I think I need to mention the weather. How AWESOMELY beautiful has it been lately?! I guess you probably wouldn't know unless you live in Minnesota, but I think this is the first week that Jared and I have been able to keep the heat off all week. Plus, we sleep with the windows open at night.  think it is about 57 degrees out right now. It has been glorious. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to spend any time outside, but it's still nice to be able to go to school and not dread parking in the back lot.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Yay!

Yesterday I mentioned that I have SIX projects to complete in the next four weeks. Well one of my projects requires me to conduct a research project and then analyze the results. Sounds fun, right? Haha. Well, I decided I wanted to look at the perceived sources of stress among undergraduate nursing students at my school because it gave me the opportunity to integrate both of my degrees and research a topic that I clearly have a lot of experience with :)

Well I was a little nervous about how many people I could get to actually respond to my survey because I know that the junior class is nearing the end of one of their busiest semesters, and seniors- well if they are anything like me that have major senioritis and don't want to do anything they don't have to. 

But there is good news! My survey was sent out yesterday, late in the afternoon, and already 47 people have responded!!!!! I am so relieved. My advisor said I probably need at least 30 students from each class, so I am hoping there is a relatively equal distribution...but people still have a whole week to reply, so things are looking good. Yay!

The Final Stretch

After tomorrow I will only have four weeks of class left, plus one final the following week. I am clearly in the final stretch of my undergraduate career and am completely overwhelmed! 

I have SIX projects to complete in four weeks, two of which are group projects, which I hate because no one is ever willing to get together- they all think it is just easier to e-mail, which of course is easy for them because I normally end-up doing all the work...In addition, I have several papers and a variety of other lengthy homework (the type that only allow me 8 hours of sleep between Monday night and Thursday morning).

Right now I am running on 4-1/2 hours of sleep, plus a 15 minute nap...and I'm pretty sure tomorrow will be the same. I wish I could say that Easter break will bring some rest and relaxation, but I think if I actually want to graduate on time then it is going to have to be a working weekend. 

However, that isn't to say there will be no play. Jared's birthday is on Monday, and although I won't be around due to school/clinicals from 11 AM- 11:30 PM...we are sort of celebrating his birthday (and my dad's) on Saturday with my family. My siblings should all be in town, so the plan is to go to Water Park of America and then to play wally-ball at the YMCA. So even though it's not Jared's ideal way to celebrate his birthday, I think it should be a ton of fun. 

A "family fun day" is sort of a tradition around Easter. In the past, my family has enjoyed going to a hotel in St. Cloud, but this year we thought it would be better to stay in town. So actually...this day was sort of planned before birthday's were even discussed, which of course my husband forgot when he asked if we could go out to a nice place for steak on Saturday...so I think we will do that the following weekend- which will be nice because I'm sure by then I will need another mental health day.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Dear God, I am Listening.

I know just the other day I talked about how I was going to trust that God had a plan for me. Well...it's been really hard.

This week I was expecting to hear back about the job in Bismarck, and also if I was selected for an interview at Regions Hospital here in town. WELL...it's thursday and I haven't gotten a call yet. Then on top of that, I talked to a girl in my class and she was offered a job this week at the hospital I interviewed at in Bismarck.

SO...I called the hospital in Bismarck and talked to the lady I interviewed with...I just casually asked how she was doing with all the awful weather they were having, and then I mentioned that I had been thinking about something she mentioned in the interview- and that was the number of people she was hiring and the shifts they would be working. WELL, apparently I had it all wrong. I could have sworn on my life that in my interview she said she was looking to hire two people to work nights, and one to just work weekends. So I apologized for being wrong, and she said it was good that I called to clarify what I had heard and then I proceeded to tell her that I didn't think I made it clear that that I was flexible to work any shift. (Because she didn't even ask me...)

Overall, the conversation went really well. We chatted a little, had a few laughs, talked business and then she told me that she would be making a decision in the next 2-3 weeks, which again, is different than what I was told in the interview. So I'm really glade I called because I let her know I was still interested, and I know I'm what's going on.

************************************
So back to the whole trusting God thing...after I talked to the girl that got the job offer (from a different department) at the same hospital I interviewed at, I text my husband- and of course it was pretty negative. Something along the lines of "It's not looking good for me."

Well my dear old husband came back at me with a positive attitude and suggested I read Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your path.

THEN...I went to one to class and we had a speaker that was talking about how the job market is frustrating and right now we just need to "step back and give it all to God."

Do you think God was trying to say something to me today?! Because I DO! 

At the beginning of the week I read a verse in the bible that said that God honors persistent prayers so I started praying that I would get good news about a job. But I think I have been praying for the wrong thing...I've never felt really good asking God for specific "things" other than help developing honorable character qualities and strength to overcome specific temptations, so I don't know why I thought it would be a good idea to start with praying for a job. Instead, what I should have been doing was praying for God to guide me down the path that he has planned for me. After all, I should know by now that every single plan I have ever made for myself has not worked out! This is why I have been in school for six years, and have had seven different majors...

Another thing I realized this week is...I have a second major! HELLO! Why am I not looking for jobs related to my Community Health degree? Today the guest speaker we had in class said taking a job that at least gets your foot in the door, is better than nothing. Maybe my first post-graduation job wont be as a nurse. That doesn't mean I can never work as a nurse! Community health experience could be great. It would help me develop really great knowledge base of the needs that the patients I have in a hospital some day may really need. I just have to TRUST that God will allow the right employers see the value in my experience.

TRUST...at first it seems like such a simple thing to do, but it really isn't! I think this next week I need to pray (persistently!) that God will help me develop trust in him. Then maybe he will reveal his plan to me.