Payday, Bills, Anxiety

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Truth #1: I get very anxious when I don't pay my bills immediately after waking up on the days I get paid.

Seriously. I sometimes wake up extra early, and I pay my bills in bed before I have the opportunity to do anything else. If I don't do this, I get super tense.

Truth #2: I pay 80% of my bills with one paycheck. I usually use the last paycheck of the month to pay the following months bills. Ex. My last paycheck in November is used to pay most of my December bills.

Truth #3: I think paydays suck. I hate that nearly 30% of my gross pay never makes it into the bank.

Truth #4: I get paid by the hour...which sometimes makes me feel like I am still in high school.


With that said, I am so thankful for my job, and the ability to pay my bills. Jared and I are blessed beyond measures. For the majority of our marriage, only one of us has work. Which has allowed each of us to take our time pursuing our dreams.

Of course a large part of this has to do with Jared's service in the military...but it's a blessing nonetheless. Even though we live a fairly simple life, I just don't know how most people make ends meet every month. So although payday usually brings stress and anxiety with it, I can't help but also feel very humbled and blessed. Especially this time of year.

Stay Tuned!

Jared suprised me by coming into town on Tuesday! I wasn't sure he was going to make it for Thanksgiving because there was a big storm that was going to hit North Dakota on Wednesday, which was the day he had been planning on leaving. But the little sneak decided e-mailed his teachers, and skipped class so he could make it home to see me!!!

So clearly I'm not blogging much this week because my attention is focused elsewhere. But stay tuned! I'll be back before you know it!

BTW: Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!!!!

Before I went to work, I filled up on this... Source

Then when I got to work, I filled up on this:

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One of my co-workers made some delicious fried rice!!!

Excuse me now while I go watch a Christmas movie with the husband!!!

Morning Glory: Have you seen it?!

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Was anyone as excited to see the movie "Morning Glory" as I was?! I couldn't wait for it to come out!

So here is my review...

This movie is about a TV producer, Becky (aka Rachel McAdams), who is fired from her job at a local TV station. After searching high and low, she lands a job as the executive producer of a national morning show, "Daybreak." The problem is, the show isn't doing very well and one of the co-hosts is only there because of a minor stipulation in his contract with the TV station. Although he could be the solution to poor ratings, he is making Becky's job very difficult.

Overall, I definitely liked this movie. I paid $5 for my ticket, and wasn't disappointed. I LOVE Rachel McAdams, and I think she did a fantastic job in this movie. I love how in all of her roles she is able to embrace the character. Her emotions and reactions are fantastic!

To be honest, I thought the romance between Becky (Rachel McAdams) and Adam (Patrick Wilson) would be more significant that it was. It would have been nice to see them develop that relationship a little more, but I also liked that it wasn't the focus.

There was only one blatantly obvious costume/editing mistake that I noticed (I don't have the best eye for those types of things, but they annoy me!), and I thought the ending was cute. I would definitely recommend this movie for a girls-night because I'm not sure men would find this one very entertaining.

My rating: 3-1/2 out of 5

True Stories from The Mad House, Part 1

I've decided to nickname my new job "The Mad House" because it literally feel like I just went to the circus every.single.day.

So here are my stories from tonight...

1. We admitted a patient who faked shortness of breath to the point where the doctors thought about admitting her to the ICU...she did this so she wouldn't have to spend the night in a shelter.
2. The same patient mentioned in #1 yelled at the nursing assistance because she thought that the NA "threw" her toast onto a plate instead of placed it there nicely.
3. I had a doctor order a continuous infusion of 1 L of fluid per hour...with no stop time. I'm sorry, are we trying to drowned this person from the inside?!
4. I almost stepped in a pile of puke because my patient apparently leaned over the side of their bed, vomited on the floor and then went to sleep without telling anyone.
5. Someone asked for diet water.
6. A patient wouldn't let the phlebotomist take blood unless she gave him a carton of milk.

Sad as these stories may be, they are all true.
...and this was a "slow" night.

**Story #1 makes me sad, but more than that, it makes me angry. I am sorry that this person is homeless, and hates staying in a shelter...but they took a bed away from a truly sick person that needed it, and that upsets me.


On the bright side...

I got a compliment on my scrub top, was told by two people I looked good in violet, and I didn't look like a monster when I got off of work!!!

I also didn't get any chocolate stain on my bottom while wearing white pants! (And yes, I have sat in chocolate while wearing white pants before...and subsequently I stopped wearing white pants, and eating granola bars...)

I got a free flu shot at work!

Prayer request: A couple weeks ago, piece of equipment malfunctioned at The Mad House, and I was splashed in the eye with body fluids...and as a result I was exposed to Hepatitis C. To top it off, I wasn't treated per hospital protocol (which I didn't know at the time) thus increasing my risk of contracting this untreatable disease. It will be able six months before I know whether or not I have Hep C or not, so if you wouldn't mind- please pray for my well-being, and peace of mind. Thanks :)

Core Shaking

Yesterday was one of those days when I felt that God was really trying to speak me.

1. I almost didn't go to church yesterday because I thought that listening to the sermon online was pretty much the same thing, but then ultimately decided to go because I knew that I would most likely never get around to actually listening to it. Fifteen minutes into the sermon my pastor pretty much spoke right to me about this.
2. For a couple of weeks now I have been thinking about how much I want more strong, Christian, female friends.

Then my pastor said the following:

"A time will come when each one of use will receive news that will shake you to the core...and here's my question: Are you so connected to this body that when that news comes your way the body will be here to love, support, heal and help you?"

This really shook me up...because for a couple of weeks now I've been wanting to find a bible study, or some other type of group of Christian women to connect with because the truth is, I don't have any Christian friends. Or at least none that I am very close to...and if a tragedy were to strike me, or my family tomorrow I'm not sure who I could call on to lift me up in prayer. My faith is important to me, but for some reason it hasn't had a large influence on the types of relationships that I form and that breaks my heart.

I walk in, and out of church each week and not only know that I go virtually unnoticed, but I have enjoyed that!

Basically, I don't know what I am going to do but I know I need to change something about the way I connect with other people. I don't think I am necessarily interested in looking for a different/smaller church (although I do like that some churches offer adult Sunday school before their services); and I know there are ways to get involved in my church, but truthfully I'm not sure I am interested in that either because I don't think it will offer me the flexibility I am going to need with my work schedule. So...maybe I'm looking for some sort of extraneous group??? I'm not really sure at this point...

If you have any suggestions, please let me know! Leave a comment, or send me an e-mail at: thebetterhalfoflife@gmail.com.

Happy Friday!!!

I hope you have a great weekend!!!

My plans are to...

1. Cook dinner twice for my family
2. Take my Grandpa to the "Chocolate: The Exhibit" at the Minnesota History Center
3. Start working out again...I've been a slacker since coming back from vacation
4. READ!
5. Go to church, preferably on Saturday night
6. Run my bi-weekly errands
7. Buy a few more sets of scrubs for work

Question: What are your plans for the weekend? Do you have something exciting planned, or are you going to relax and rejuvenate?

Midnight Jam Session

The past two weeks have been really tough...I've been feeling a little down lately, and on top of that, work has been very, VERY stressful. In fact, I have been so stressed out at work that a few nights ago I caught myself thinking "Can I do this for the rest of my life?" Thinking this might not seem like a huge deal to most people, but in the 361 days I've been a working nurse this thought has never once crossed my mind.

Tonight was a good night though. I was able to sit down and eat dinner at a decent time, and even had the time, and mental capacity to read some scripture on break. When I left work, I didn't feel guilty about not being able to get everything done because I was completely caught up!

I usually leave work around 11:30 PM, and call Jared right away. You can shun me for this, I typically talk on the phone with him as I drive home. He tells me about school, and I vent about work. Tonight was a little different though. He fell asleep, and was too tired to talk...so I jammed out to KTIS, (the local Christian radio station), and this is exactly what I needed.

I have never been so ready for the weekend in my entire life! I don't have anything exciting planned, and that's okay. I'm just glade I don't have to work!!! I am thankful my work week ended on a good note, and even better yet...I had a great time belting out some worship songs. I even sat in my car a few extra minutes to finish singing this song...

Wonderful One

Some say you're a lunatic, some
Say you're not the one
Can't help but disagree with it,
I believe you're God's own son
I'm sure as a man can be, knowing
All you've saved me from
I know first hand the miracles
That you've done inside my heart
I'll gladly stand and testify just who you are

Chorus:
(you're the wonderful one)
Every breath I take I want my
Life to bring you praise
(you're the wonderful one)
I am so amazed by your never-ending grace
(you're the wonderful one)
And nothing in this world could
Separate me from your love
(you're the wonderful one)

Well I've seen all the evidence,
Nothing else I need to know
I'm convinced that a world like this
Needs to know that there is hope

I know first hand the miracles that
You've done inside my heart
I'll gladly stand and testify just who you are

Chorus

Bridge:
You help me in my helplessness,
You heal me in my brokenness
Tell me how could I forget
The wonders of your love

Chorus

Today is a Special Day...

Today is the 235th Birthday of the United States Marine Corp!

But that's not it!!!

Five years ago today, Jared also asked me to be his wife!

Today Jared text me and said: the "two things I'm most proud of in my life are 1. Marrying the most wonderful woman in the world, you and 2. Being a United States Marine."

Awww! Ain't he the best?!
I'm so proud of you babe! Happy Birthday!

*My wedding pictures were taken by Stephen Geffre

Babies, Kids. Kids, Babies.

"So, do you have kids?"

This my friends, has become the million dollar question...and I guess I can't really blame anyone for asking. After all, my husband is 29, I am 26 six, we have been married for over three years, and I do have a good job...So, if you completely ignore the fact/don't know that Jared is not living in Minnesota, the question makes sense.

But the truth is, even if Jared and I hadn't spent the last year moving around and living apart from time to time, I'm not sure the answer- Nope, no kids- would be any different.

Don't get me wrong, I want kids. I love the idea of having kids, and if I were to find out I was pregnant tomorrow, I would be thrilled! But as far as trying to have kids...I'm a little apathetic, and after putting a lot of thought into this topic, I've also decided I am just plain selfish.

I just want to spend time with my husband right now...just me, and him. No supplementary worries. I want his undivided attention, and I want to give him mine. So that's it. No kids, no pets, and no projected timeline for expanding our family...It's just me, and my husband and I'm completely satisfied with that. For now.

Enter > Awkward silence, and blank stare

**BTW, I don't tell most people that Jared is living in ND right now...I've come to the conclusion it's just not worth trying to explain.

I Love/Hate Reading

One of my goals this year was to start reading more. It was something I enjoyed doing a lot when I was younger, but sort of fell away from as school, sports and work took over my life.

My favorite types of books are historical fiction. Stuff like Little House On The Prairie, Gone with the Wind, Redeeming Love, and The Linage of Grace Series.

So here is what I love about reading: I love reading because it allows me to use my imagination...and I mean to REALLY use my imagination. I don't have any artistic or creative talents, but when I read, and am able to develop pictures, places, characters and relationships in my own head, and for a moment I feel like an artist...and I enjoy that. I also like how I can forget about my own life for a little while, and "live" someone else's...how I am able travel to a place I've never been, but not actually leave the comfort of my own home.

...and now for what I hate: I hate that when I am reading a good book, I don't want to do anything else! I hate how long it can take me to finish a book...and that is why I end up watching a lot of movies. (I know...I'm a sell-out).

So here is what I have read in the past few months recently...

The Eat Clean Diet

I really liked this book. The information is pretty basic, and at times a little redundant, but I think it is a good book for anyone who needs a little motivation, or help to jump-start their journey to a healthier lifestyle. If nothing else, it has sparked my interest in clean eating and I'm interest to read more on the topic.

The Memory Keeper's Daughter

This book took me months to read...I just couldn't really get into story. That's all I'm going to say about that.

The Secret Life of Bees

I actually saw this movie before hand. I really liked both the movie, and the book. Although, this is probably the first time where I haven't thought the book was A LOT better than the movie.

The Heretic Queen

I actually picked this book up upon recommendation of D.A.R. You can read her review here.

The Quiet Game

When I read a legal thriller, I'm not necessarily looking for a realistic story...I am looking for excitement, and this book definitely had it. I would actually have to say that this is the best legal thriller I have read in a long time, if not the best legal thriller I have ever read. This story is about a famous lawyer turned author who moved back to the town he grew up in after loosing his wife. Soon after returning home, he found himself investigating an unsolved hate murder that took place during his childhood, and dealing with some very dangerous and powerful people.

Haha!

This was posted facebook by a friend of mine, and thought I would pass it on because it's sort of funny :)

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make it greater. Give her sperm, she will give you a baby. Give her a house, she will give you a home. Give her groceries, she will give you a meal. Give her a smile, she will give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what she is given. So... if you give her crap, be prepared to receive a ton of s**t!"

Second Blog

Hey all! I'm starting a second blog. One that focuses more on my faith, and relationship with God because my spiritual life is in serious need of revamping.

I'm still going to blog here about most other things. My new/second blog will be more like a journal of the scripture I read, and the things that inspire or touch my heart in a spiritual sense. Check is out if you would like!

Grace, Forgiveness, Hope